Turn on device memory planing as default

[Gasoonjia]

Stack from ghstack (oldest at bottom):

• [ET Device Support] CUDA-native Qwen 3.5 MoE inference with device tensor pipeline #18788
• -> Turn on device memory planing as default #20214
• [ET Device Support] Add device tensor helper functions to TensorPtr API #19828
• [ET Device Support] make device support config method-based #19582
• [ET Device Support] Add ExecutorchBackendConfig flags for skipping H2D/D2H copies #18760
• [ET Device Support] PropagateDevicePass inserts H2D/D2H copy ops at delegate boundaries #18730
• [ET Device Support] Add device tensor helper functions to TensorPtr API #18761

This diff turn on the on-device memory planing as default, so that every delegate which enables on device memory planing will be use that./

Also update cuda backend to remove H2D/D2H copies and extra caches

Differential Revision: D107597774

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❌ 7 New Failures, 1 Cancelled Job, 2 Pending, 26 Unrelated Failures, 2 Unclassified Failures

As of commit f22220c with merge base 875cc58 ():

NEW FAILURES - The following jobs have failed:

• Build Presets / apple (llm) / build (gh)
  The process '/opt/homebrew/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• Build Presets / apple (profiling) / build (gh)
• pull / test-lora-linux / linux-job (gh)
  RuntimeError: Command docker exec -t 6cbac26c7c0165b5d6189873e3b9e594f4ea21ec99f64b864ac54d01082c4576 /exec failed with exit code 1
• pull / unittest-nxp-neutron / linux-job (gh)
  RuntimeError: Command docker exec -t cd27826801663776e1171c24890830be6d19893fc57498b33ab62f7fbabc1d9c /exec failed with exit code 1
• Test CUDA Builds / test-models-cuda / linux-job (gh)
  RuntimeError: Command docker exec -t b09c9b083e30726bfad4954724a8660e232f8a9f289f165c7b09b7fbbd2e2f34 /exec failed with exit code 134
• Test CUDA Builds / unittest-cuda / linux-job (gh)
  backends/cuda/tests/test_tq4_sdpa.py::TestTQ4Sdpa::test_e2e_cpp_runner
• Test Metal Backend / export-model-metal-artifact (openai, whisper-small, non-quantized) / macos-job (gh)
  No files were found with the provided path: /Users/ec2-user/runner/_work/_temp/artifacts/. No artifacts will be uploaded.

UNCLASSIFIED FAILURES - DrCI could not classify the following jobs because the workflow did not run on the merge base. The failures may be pre-existing on trunk or introduced by this PR:

• Build Windows Wheels / pytorch/executorch / build-wheel-py3_10-cpu (gh) (this job did not run on the merge base, so DrCI cannot tell whether the failure is pre-existing)
  Process completed with exit code 1.
• Build Windows Wheels / pytorch/executorch / upload / upload-wheel-py3_10-cpu (gh) (this job did not run on the merge base, so DrCI cannot tell whether the failure is pre-existing)
  Unable to download artifact(s): Artifact not found for name: pytorch_executorch__3.10_cpu_x64

CANCELLED JOB - The following job was cancelled. Please retry:

• Test Metal Backend / export-model-metal-artifact (openai, whisper-large-v3-turbo, non-quantized) / macos-job (gh)
  ##[error]The operation was canceled.

FLAKY - The following jobs failed but were likely due to flakiness present on trunk:

• pull / test-arm-backend-no-driver (test_pytest_ops_tosa) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-arm-cortex-m-size-test (zephyr-preset) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-binary-size-linux / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-llama-runner-linux (fp32, xnnpack+custom+qe, linux.arm64.2xlarge, executorch-ubuntu-22.04-gc... / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-llama-runner-linux-android / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-llama-runner-qnn-linux (fp32, qnn_16a16w, qnn) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-llama-runner-qnn-linux (fp32, qnn_8a8w, qnn) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-models-linux (add_mul, xnnpack-quantization-delegation, linux.2xlarge) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-models-linux (emformer_join, portable, linux.4xlarge.memory) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-models-linux (emformer_transcribe, xnnpack-quantization-delegation, linux.2xlarge) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-models-linux (resnet18, xnnpack-quantization-delegation, linux.2xlarge) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-models-linux (w2l, portable, linux.4xlarge.memory) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-moshi-linux / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 1
• pull / test-qnn-models-linux (mv2) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-qnn-testsuite-linux / test-backend-linux (qnn, models) / linux-job (gh) (detected as infra flaky with no log or failing log classifier)
• pull / test-qnn-wheel-packages-linux (3.11) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-quantized-aot-lib-linux / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• pull / test-static-llama-qnn-linux (stories_260k_bc) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 1
• pull / unittest-wasm-bindings (--enable-etdump) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• Test CUDA Builds / export-model-cuda-artifact (facebook, dinov2-small-imagenet1k-1-layer, non-quantized) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• Test CUDA Builds / export-model-cuda-artifact (mistralai, Voxtral-Mini-3B-2507, quantized-int4-tile-packed) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• Test CUDA Windows Export and E2E / export-model-cuda-windows-artifact (facebook, dinov2-small-imagenet1k-1-layer, non-quantized) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• Test CUDA Windows Export and E2E / export-model-cuda-windows-artifact (nvidia, parakeet-tdt, quantized-int4-weight-only) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• Test WebGPU Backend / test-webgpu / test-backend-linux (webgpu, models) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128
• Test XNNPACK Backend / test-xnnpack / test-backend-linux (xnnpack, models) / linux-job (gh) (matched linux rule in flaky-rules.json)
  The process '/usr/bin/git' failed with exit code 128

BROKEN TRUNK - The following job failed but were present on the merge base:

👉 Rebase onto the `viable/strict` branch to avoid these failures

• Test Metal Backend / export-model-metal-artifact (mistralai, Voxtral-Mini-4B-Realtime-2602, quantized-int4-metal) / macos-job (gh) (trunk failure)

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